(I think) I’m Trying

It’s not that I’m not trying
I’m trying to understand what I did
What I said that was wrong

I check our chat logs
I check my memory
They are flawed

But I still don’t see it
Maybe in the same way
You don’t see what you did wrong

You put me in a box
You labelled me
With things other people said
With things I told you in confidence
With things that happened just once
You don’t see me for who I am
It hurts
Because I thought you did

My feeble mind
Is filled with
How quick you are to anger
How quickly you jump to conclusions
How you judge me all the time
I guess I don’t know you too
I’m sorry
I thought I did

I’m not playing games
I just can’t get my mind
Around everything

We live in a world
By our own narratives
To our own analysis
By our fluctuating emotions
By the way we communicate
With the feelings that may be
Too difficult to grasp

I don’t understand
How can things be worked out
When we can never fully understand
What someone else is feeling
No matter how hard we try

But I’m trying

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